The Power of Attention - a link

http://wisdomofhands.blogspot.com.au/2013/01/attention.html

This guy is worth checking out.  His posts on education (he works as a woodwork teacher in primary schools) are very interesting to read, and I find very relevant to homeschooling.

Best wishes
Jen

Fridges and Obesity

Okay, so you are wondering how those two are linked. 

Here's my theory.  Before we had good quality refridgeration people would grow their own fresh produce or swap with neighbours for fresh produce.  Going to the shops wasn't such a big distraction of packaged goods for our spending dollar.

So people would eat more fresh fruit and vegetables.  And work physically in the garden to grow those vegetables and fruit.  Everything was fresh.  You could pick some lettuce on Tuesday and pick some more fresh on Friday.  Very good and healthy for us!

Now we drive to a supermarket where the produce is not so fresh due to transport times.  Then we can choose to buy a week's worth of lettuce but we know it won't last in the fridge, and we won't likely have the space to store it either.  If we want to get "fresh" vegetables and fruit more often from the supermarket we also run the risk of the distractions of the aisles and all their easy to store foods.

If I tried to buy a proper week's worth of fruit and vegetables for my family of 6 they would not fit in my fridge, nor most other standard newer fridges.  I am stuck with going to the shops more often (more temptation for bad stuff) or with eating less vegetables.  

Take into account also the "less exercise" factor of going to the shops vs growing in our backyards and I really think the temptations of easy refridgeration is to blame for our obesity epidemic.

Hmm, I bet there are big holes in this theory but it does bear thinking about.

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 28 days to go

So I have been thinking about why this whole homeschooling idea didn't work out so well for our family.  I want to understand why so that I can return to it in the future.

Some factors that have had an influence on how well (or not) it has gone:

1. Tiredness due to extended breastfeeding, usually 4 years per child, longer in 2 cases
2. Tiredness and mummy fog due to a pregnancy every 3 to 3.5 years, yup, the pregnancies overlap the breastfeeding
3. Tiredness due to headaches and fogginess due to chronic grass allergies that flare up into seasonal sinus headaches that really knock me down (so very thankful I don't have migraines though so I don't see this as a whinge at all, just the facts as they are)
4. Inability to direct my kids to do what I want them to do as I don't like confrontation
5. A definite lack of funds for about 6 of those years, which tends to make me freeze up mentally and not use anything in case we don't have the resources to move on, also meant there was no funds for organising all the things that come with homeschooling and 4 children's worth of toys and clothes
6. Depression due to tiredness, guilt, feeling of low self worth, messy house with no tools to organise it all due to lack of funds
7. Having an oppositional Aspie child as my eldest (remember I don't like confrontation!) threw my self confidence out the window, no idea on how to handle him 
8. Lack of confidence in my ability to teach when everything I tried didn't help my eldest to learn to read (he finally got it on his own around 9 years old and I felt like nothing I did contributed to his learning at all)
9. No family support close by although my mum and dad are supportive of homeschooling!  TG!
10. No time off, as in None for a very long time!  For basically 12 years, until the eldest was old enough to be left home for short periods with younger ones to mind, I did not have a single break from parenting and household responsibilities.  If I went out while dh looked after the kids it was solely for jobs like shopping, library visits, or actual income work at a local supermarket.  I didn't get to go anywhere on my own.
11. My introvert nature gets overwhelmed by managing all the noise associated with 4 children who I haven't had the energy/confidence to teach to act in a way that doesn't overwhelm me.
12. Moving interstate and between towns several times - no feeling settled, no friends, no networks of support!
13. Self discipline that could really do with some work (But as most of my self discipline issues also hinge on directing others to fit into the life I envision for us, it doesn't help that avoiding conflict is an issue for me too.  It is enough that I need to have conflict with my own comfortable but not useful ways but to then also try to direct others to move out of their comfortable but not useful ways is just too much especially when I am tired - see above.)

Wow!  I hope that covers everything.  I need to see what I can do to "fix" some of these.  Hopefully some things are just seasons and will soon be off the "problem" list.

1. For example, no more kids to come, and only 1 last child to wean.  
2. Dh fully understands that a family our size needs a steady income.  He will be doing his utmost to ensure we don't have long periods of low income again.   
3. I have found a combination of natural remedies and homeopathic remedies that seem to be reducing my reactions to my grass allergies.  
4. We will be moving closer to family again with the next job. 
5.  I will be making sure to establish some support networks for myself very quickly when that happens.

And I am really hoping that as the tiredness and depression from the guilt, money stresses and loneliness lift that I will have the courage to try again, to do what I need to do to homeschool my kids again after this break.
Best wishes
Jen

Quote about Goals, New Year coming and all that!

The reason that ‘a good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving’ is simply that to focus on the destination is to focus on an illusion. There is no destination, only a journey, and to become fixated on a point in the future which never arrives is to miss the journey itself.

From  http://changeyourlife.net/living-without-goals/

The article lays out what is wrong with goals and then gives some great ideas for a better way to live.  I think I will be re-reading this one a few times.  Very thought provoking!

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 41 days to go

If the count seems off it is because I thought they would start school on Tuesday 29 January but I found out the other day they start on the Wednesday.  I also found out that they are putting Jackson in to year 5 (he turns 11 at the beginning of the year) and Harrison into year 3 (he turns 8 at the beginning of the year).  I hope that doesn't cause issues for Harrison.  He is bright but his maturity may not match the others in his class with him having a February birthday, although... he is possibly more mature as he has older brothers to play with.  Hmm, don't know, will keep an eye on it all.

This a sort of out of order list of things that would bother me if they changed too drastically due to the boys being at school.  Again some things have more weight in my mind than others.

• They need to still be able spend valuable family time together eg dinner together as much as possible and free time on the weekends, not overtaken by school projects/homework.

• They need to be willing to play with each other and to still be understanding when their siblings are at different levels of skill and understanding.

• I won't tolerate name calling, or derogatory remarks about other's achievements or lack of skills.  I will be very firm on this as it is something that I have always had a zero tolerance for and if the school influence is so strong that I am constantly battling this issue it will be a big deal.

• I would like to hear that the boys treat each other well at school and do not get so influenced by peer pressure that they won't "play" with a sibling if they are lonely or struggling.

• I would like them to have friends that are willing to visit for playdates outside school hours.  If friendships are only at school I really don't see much difference to how our homeschooling experience in this small town is working out and I will re-evaluate the "value" of school for socialising.

• The boys need to be "allowed" to work at their own level with a bit of encouragement for improving.  I don't want to see them held back and getting bored or pushed so hard that they are not able to overcome the stress of working a little harder to achieve a better result.

• Our health has always been pretty good and I value it.  If more than 2 weeks are lost each term due to viruses going through the family then I will not be pleased.  Of course I know the first term could be rough, new environment and all that, and second not so good with change of season stuff, but by halfway through the year I would hope they are not coming home with a new bug every few weeks.  It would really be hard to be "sick" all the time, very tiring.

Love to hear your comments,
Jen

Home School to Public School - 44 days to go

So here is my scratch list so far of the Pro's and Con's of School and Homeschool.

I know not everything is here but these are the ones that are important to me and keep me thinking (and worrying!).

School:
Pro's

• packed lunch
• see what others eat, may be more willing to try new things
• exposure to other interests eg choir, sports
• learn that not everything is easy
• learn to push themselves instead of coasting
• time for me to have a hobby
• get help to get up to "grade" level
• will get the chance to experience a "regular" schedule of work, meals and play
• hopefully more friends for a birthday party or play dates
• home will be tidier and cleaner due to no kids around

Con's

• bullies but hopefully not
• negative attitude from a teacher
• unable to "fit in" when it is necessary
• uniform costs
• pushing of reading may lead to dislike of lifelong reading
• disrespect of mum and dad, more respect for teachers
• miss out on a more interesting education with bunny trails
• miss out on using lots of resources I already have
• "system" doesn't care about my values for my family
• house may be "too quiet"

Homeschool:
Pro's

• focused teacher attention so won't "fall through the cracks" if some area is not learnt well
• hugs and support when work is hard
• can learn at own pace with choice of curriculum to suit learning style
• better breakfasts

Con's

• too easy to slow down too much too often
• distraction of TV and PCs
• Mum gets distracted by "projects"
• Mum's health can be up and down and days, even weeks, can be missed until she is better
• messy and noisy house nearly all the time
• can't keep up with household chores on my own in the time available

 Well, at least now I can "lose" the piece of paper I was writing it all down on.  And not everything is equally weighted in it's impact, so the decision is still not easy.  Ah well!

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 64 days to go

So in the most part I am actually accepting the idea of school now.  I am even at peace with it.

Today I read this post from a dad about kids who don't learn how to deal with pain and how it doesn't necessarily make their life as an adult easier.  The rest of the blog is also great.  In fact bought the book and read it over the weekend.  :-)

This is a big factor in the decision to put some of my kids in school.  While it hurts my heart that they may not make friends easily, may get rejected at times (as we all do) and will have to cope with being behind/ahead in some subjects, I do also know that my kids have been protected by our homeschooling.  With everything else in our lives being fairly stable at the moment and likely to be for the next 12 months this is the ideal time to take on the big Public School Experiment. 

In the 4 years before we settled here we had moved from Brisbane to Hobart to Launceston to Dorrigo in NSW, to the Hunter Valley.  We were not in any of those places (except Brisbane) for more than 12 months.  Now we have been here almost 6 years.  I couldn't put my kids in school during that time of upheaval.  I didn't think it was fair on them when we had so many other stresses going on but now... not so bad.

I still have my boundaries in place.  There are certain lines that if crossed will mean the end of the PSE.  I will post those another day.

Best wishes
Jen