Frozen in Inaction due to Fear

The fear of failure is bringing the past into the future 

while doing nothing today.  

This isn't a great quote from anywhere (unless I am remembering something I read somewhere and I don't know where) but just from my pondering this morning as I think about the planning I need to do for groceries this week and this next interval of school work. 

I am over sitting down to do either of these jobs and having my gut recoil in fear.  And so often to avoid that pain I won't do anything, just making it worse next time it becomes critical to do these jobs.  I am also doing more research into my migraine symptoms as they occur and too often Google tells me that my symptoms are anxiety headaches yet I don't think I feel anxious.  Maybe my gut reaction is saying something different.

Off to eat my frogs,
Jen

Agile and Adaptive Planning for Homeschoolers

I was looking around one day on planning ideas from the corporate world that may fit the homeschool world.   Most of this post is about my thoughts when reading a Wikipedia entry on Agile Software Development.  (accessed 25 October 2017)

Agile software development describes a set of values and principles for software development under which requirements and solutions evolve through the collaborative effort of self-organizing cross-functional teams.[1] It advocates adaptive planning, evolutionary development, early delivery, and continuous improvement, and it encourages rapid and flexible response to change.

Adaptive planning is definitely what we need in our home schools.  Children change just as often and often more drastically than the needs of a client would change for a software developer.  We certainly can not hold too tightly to any plan and we need to be flexibly responsive to our "client's" needs.

Most agile development methods break product development work into small increments that minimize the amount of up-front planning and design. Iterations, or sprints, are short time frames (timeboxes) that typically last from one to four weeks.

I find myself planning in small bursts but in 5-6 weeks bursts.  I find that I can in the most part successfully complete my goals in science, history and geography but I do find there is a need to be flexible with maths and language arts as these require understanding before moving on.

Also in looking further into timeboxes I found that the most important factor is the time constraint for the most important part of the project.  It can mean loss of some of the ideal parts but the biggest emphasis is on completing the most important parts within the time frame set.  This is certainly how science, history and geography can be treated.  I may not get every activity done, every map completed or every experiment done in real life but we do keep the most important parts.

Compared to traditional software engineering, agile software development mainly targets complex systems and product development with dynamic, non-deterministic and non-linear characteristics. Accurate estimates, stable plans, and predictions are often hard to get in early stages, and confidence in them is likely to be low.

In looking up the definition of non-deterministic I learned that a deterministic system always produces the same output from a given starting condition or state.  Non-deterministic is definitely how I would describe children.  There is definitely no way they all develop the same way.  So in our homeschool planning we need to take this into account.  In my early days of homeschooling I definitely thought I had found the One and Only curriculum for certain subjects.  Needless to say more money and bookshelf space later I have learned that there isn't any one solution for my whole school.  I have had to flex and not hold too tightly to any plan because my children are "dynamic, non-deterministic and non-linear".    That is sort of what makes it fun.

Scott Ambler states that documentation should be "Just Barely Good Enough" (JBGE),[35] that too much or comprehensive documentation would usually cause waste, and developers rarely trust detailed documentation because it's usually out of sync with code,[34] while too little documentation may also cause problems for maintenance, communication, learning and knowledge sharing.

This part really resonated with me.  I don't know how many times I have planned out a whole year in full detail, printed it and bound it, to only find that it is out of sync with how our school year goes.  I love a plan, don't get me wrong, but I have learned that it is better to have goals for both skills and topics to be covered and then I only put in definite details as we approach each block when I am more aware of our health, our other commitments, our interruptions and our resources.  

It is always useful seeing that the corporate world's ideas on planning can be helpful.  It just takes being reflective and considering how the ideas can help us in our homes.

Best wishes
Jen

Suitcase insights

I was just reading this article and these are my thoughts for my later consideration.

We carry everything with us just in case.  Simplify, lighten the load.  Those things that we prepare for so diligently won't likely happen and in the meantime the weight of them causes us stress.  Deal with them when they happen and not before.  Sometimes they turn out to be simpler to deal with than we thought.


Applies to life and to homeschooling.

Jen

Homeschool Goals Brain Dump

It won't be pretty.  This is just a list I made one day when inspiration hit after reading a home school book.

Before school is done I want my boys to:
- know a good range of word roots that are common in English and Science
- know where countries are and what basic history they have... language, culture and politics and current language, culture and politics
- understand the basics of political outlooks e.g. socialism, communism, democracy, dictatorships, etc
- be able to observe their world, to be able to focus on the details when necessary and to be able to discern the beauty and the patterns of life
- be curios and to ask questions, to know who to ask, how to discern which sources are trustworthy
- appreciate nature
- by physically capable of using their bodies for fun e.g. rock climbing, tall trees, swimming, cycling, obstacle courses, trampolining
- recognise art and music that culturally significant
- be able to communicate effectively with the written and spoken word
-appreciate art by learning calligraphy, basic free hand drawing - perspective and lighting, and basic drafting
- be prepared for a technology-based world e.g. internet safety, online manners, typing skills, word processing, databases, spreadsheets
- have read or listened to some of the great books
- be able to prepare at least 5 different nutritious dinners, 2 desserts and a variety of lunches and breakfasts
- be able to the clean the centres of yuk in a home - kitchen, bathroom and laundry
- be able to wash clothes and take care of them well
- be able to create a budget and manage expenses within the income they have

Sometimes just letting it all flow out brings out up thoughts I had never consciously considered before.  This is a list I will be coming back to again.

Best wishes
Jen in Qld

A Homeschool Manual

Hi,

Have you ever had a really good idea but then in the flow of life with its ups and downs never implemented it?  Or maybe you have?

Today I found I had implemented a really good idea... twice.  :-)

As I have shuffled things around in this house I got 2 filing boxes in one place at one time and in looking through them realised that I had set up an almost identical filing system twice over for our homeschooling papers.

After having to read a training manual at work this last week I realised that I need a manual for homeschooling.  I am creating a document that lists out my goals for homeschooling, my plans for school, where things are stored and how the paper should flow through this system.

I am even thinking of creating a flow chart to show where things go when.  lol  Too much?!

Folders and boxes are now getting labels with official sounding names like Future Planning - Lesson Plans and Materials (a binder for the overview of topics and how they fit into the big picture) and Future Planning - Subject Materials (a large file box with folders for each subject for those miscellaneous things you find like a great game or crossword puzzle or fun activity, and folders for each resource that I have to copy to use eg Critical Thinking books, and folders for lessons plans with the materials that relate to them and a list of other resources and their location.

I already have Subject Boxes sitting in a bookshelf that have the current books that we are using for that subject and a small file folder that contains any worksheets or printed resources that will be needed for the current week.  Next week's work is in the Future Planning - Lesson Plans and Materials binder or the Future Planning - Subject Materials box.

The planning side of my personality is already feeling better.  I hate feeling overwhelmed.

So, how many people have a homeschool manual?  What do you have in yours and why did you decide to create it?

Best wishes
Jen

Time Management Alone Not Enough - Essay

This is an essay I wrote last year for a Uni prep subject.  Thought I would post it here.  Looking back at it I can see it has a few wrinkles but still it got me a good mark.  :)

Having dreams and being able to put in place actions that will lead to their realisation is a feature of humans that sets them apart from animals.  Many wonderful inventions such as the light bulb, the aeroplane and liquid paper have been created from the dreams in the minds of passionate and creative men and women.  Knowing how to turn those ethereal dreams and goals into physical realities effectively requires appropriate tools for time management and the achievement of dreams and goals for individuals, and for our society as a whole.  Time management alone is not sufficient.

Most people get caught up in thinking that if they finish their daily To Do List or achieve that elusive goal that their life will be complete.  This action component of goal setting is not enough though, unless it is acknowledged that humans are not only a physical body completing physical actions but also a spiritual being that needs meaning in life. Covey et al. (1994) and Smith (2000) agree that goal setting without a guiding passion or value can lead to feelings of dissatisfaction with life.  To Do Lists alone fail to bring dreams into reality for most.

In “First Things First” Covey et al. (1994) writes of four generations of time management. It is suggested that people with the first generation time management style action tasks without thought of priorities while second generation style time managers plan and schedule but don’t relate these activities to their priorities.  While possibly being able to be effective in their lives, those who follow either of the former styles will most likely find themselves living without a definite purpose in life and a feeling of dissatisfaction.  They are not realising their dreams. 

Third generation style time management people “achieve sizable gains in personal productivity through focused daily planning and prioritization” (Covey et al, 1994:25). While this may sound worthwhile this style may also prove dissatisfying.  The fourth generation moves on to a higher level of thinking, involving being aware of personal values, and being in touch with an individual’s uniqueness and their possible contribution to this world as they make decisions about what is written on their daily lists and what are their goal and dreams for life (Covey et al, 1994).  This level of time management is more likely to realise the dreams of those who utilise it.

Many time management systems available today focus on the second and third generation styles of organising, planning and creating task lists and schedules.  They miss the essential heart of the matter: that humans have hearts, with passions and a creativity that no other living being on this earth has.  Napoleon Hill (1965) suggests that each of us has a Major Definite Purpose in life and that when it is discovered we will know it for it will create a surge of energy in us (Hill, 1965:53).  Covey et al. (1994) also discuss creating a Mission Statement that inspires the individual and anchors them to that passion that helps make life worthwhile (Covey et al., 1994:116).

In day to day life there is a need to remember that humans are passionate and when driven by worthwhile dreams can achieve great feats.  While setting goals and writing task lists is a creditable action, it is valuable to note that there needs to be value in those goals and tasks or life can become a mundane pile of completed lists instead of a life of purpose.  When an individual knows what their passions are and what they value in life it will lead to a more satisfying life for them and will turn add value to our society as they achieve their dreams. 

There is a definite urgency for a different outlook on time management systems that acknowledges all of an individual’s needs, both spiritual and physical, if the human race is to continue flourishing as individuals, and as a whole.  Having purpose and reason to complete those To Do Lists will benefit the whole human race, not just the individual, and is a worthwhile reason to change how time is “managed”.

References

Covey, S.R., Merrill, A.R. & Merrill, R.R. 1994, First Things First, Fireside, New York, NY, USA.

Hill, N. 1965, The Master-Key to Riches, Ballantine Books, USA.

Smith, H.W. 2000, What Matters Most: the Power of Living Your Values, Fireside, New York, NY, USA.

Good, Bad and the Ugly! Or is it vice versa?

So working 20 odd hours a week can really change how you manage your life.  D'oh!  Of course it does!

The Ugly bit has been that our days do not start early.  My boys often don't get themselves breakfast and by the time I get up after a late night at work they are often entrenched in TV and PCs.  That certainly loads on the guilt.

The Bad is that I am not getting all the school done each day that I would like to get done.  We are not getting to the flesh of an education, only making bare bones a lot of the time, so school feels more like all work and no fun.

The Good is that I have learned to focus more quickly in the morning and even if I haven't had time to make a lovely written/typed out plan for the week I can still pick up each book we use daily and do something from it.  We have been doing rote memorising of times tables on the lounge, and spelling, grammar and writing are happening about 3-4 days a week.  The boys also work independently on their maths.  That is a lot more consistent than I have been in the past where I could miss weeks without realising it.  It also certainly helps when I like what we are using so there is no angst in getting out the books to do something, no matter how small.

It is school holidays and I hadn't intended to take a break but we are slowing down a little.  The boys have finally decided to talk to the kids down the street that are about their age.  I want them to go out and play.  I need to get my head wrapped around more realistic expectations of working and homeschooling and trim those huge plans I had at the beginning of the year back so they are workable.  I also need to finish off my Cert 3 course.

So, it is time to take a breather, fine tune what can be realistically done over the next 3 months and get on with some studies of my own.  Actually I am feeling pretty good about a time out.  Let's hope I use it effectively.

Best wishes
Jen

New studies require thinking

Hi

I have switched from Architecture for a time to study a Diploma in Business.  I am hoping this increases my employability in the short term.  The big city costs more and there are some great opportunities I want to take advantage of.

So I am reading on knowledge management for one of my first subjects and something flicked a switch.  The author of a reading asks what your company's core competency is.  It is noted that the reply would usually be a core product but that we need to think beyond a product to the company's actions and innovative abilities.

I realised that this relates to homeschooling in that we aren't trying to create a "product" that knows x, y and z but a student who has the abilities to find out x, y and maybe b or whatever their experience of life demands.  We want our students to be competent and to be innovative, not just a regurgitator of a particular piece of information.  We want them to be able to apply their knowledge and be able to gain more knowledge if necessary to meet their goals.

Anyway, significant to me, but maybe not you. :-)

Best wishes
Jen in Qld now

A Quote to Ponder

A little knowledge that acts is worth infinitely more than much knowledge that is idle.

Khalil Gibran

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/k/khalilgibr403100.html#91aO7DJBVV47OJCa.99

 

It is finally happening!

It has been a long 12 weeks but we have finally found a house, not easy when you live interstate and your husband is working so he can't take much time off to house hunt.

I think it will be good but it is hard to tell when all I have seen is videos and real estate photos.

Now to get on with the huge to do list.

Sometime after we settle I may update you all with my list of dos and don'ts for moving.  It has been a long time, over 7.5 years in fact, since we last moved but I am hoping I remember all the important bits.

Anyway, lots to do.  Hope everyone is keeping well.

And Jo, I will get to that filing, I promise!  Here is how it looks right now.

Yup, scary!!

Best wishes
Jen, soon to be "home"

Having confidence to homeschool

It is sort of like this.

From my perspective it seems there was an era where some people lost the ability to understand food and it became much easier to rely on the supermarkets to supply simple things like bread that we could make ourselves, and to supply jar mixes and packet mixes.  The people who thought this was the only way came  to rely on these premade foods, not realising there was a way to do it for themselves.  Of course, in the meantime there were still others who were making their own and even growing their own. 

Then we had the cooking show thing.  We got to see all sorts of people cooking, some like Maggie Beer with fancy stuff that those inexperienced ones would just drool over and still think cooking from scratch is not possible unless you were a professional.  Then we get to Jamie Oliver.  A bit more down to earth, and it looks a bit easier, less fussy.  Now some are starting to believe the ordinary non-professional could do this, but he is still a "professional" so maybe it is harder than he makes it look.  Still not ready to try in case they fail. Then add on Master Chef etc and we are seeing ordinary people cooking from scratch.  Now we realise maybe we can do this thing.

But still there are those people who think that you must be "qualified" as a chef or cook to be able to cook so they keep relying on their jars and packets or going out to eat "proper food" prepared by someone else.  They could have done it themselves but either they can't due to lack of belief in themselves, or an over belief in a "system" that doesn't always work for everyone's tastes or health.

This is how I view the homeschool/ public school debate.  It doesn't matter how much we try to teach people how to cook from scratch.  If their mindset is that only "professionals" can cook from scratch then they will continue to find every reason they can to support their mindset.  After all no-one likes to be wrong.

I think the problem comes when the only people who are managing the system have all the one mindset.  That is when we would become very limited in our freedoms.  And that is why the BOS (NSW Board of Studies) needs to have more input in a very regular way from the homeschooling community.  We need them to know that we have figured out how to cook even if we aren't professionals.  They need to respect that we have the right to be different from them, and that we don't have to all follow the same method.

Just a thought
Jen

Money trees

Do you ever have one of those moments when you post something somewhere, in a comment, or whatever, and you think, gee, that was deep?  I had one of those today.  A comment I made to someone else that I thought I should really read every so often just to remind myself of it.

I think money trees are deciduous and they lose their outward growth sometimes.  But just when you really need it there will be new growth, and in the meantime you have grown... in patience, in thriftiness, in inventiveness.  I have had my seasons with dh's depression and under employment.  I now have faith that the others skills I "grew" during those hard times will hold me through the deciduous seasons and I am pretty sure they will happen again so I don't fear what I am pretty sure will happen.  I just prepare!

See, it was one of those!  OK, may be not for you  :-) , but it was significant for me.

Best wishes
Jen 

Study progress and other thoughts

So far my studies are going well.  I do notice I have a tendency to immerse myself in something that is important to me.  This has meant that not all the housework necessary for a smooth running household has been happening.  I tend to cram all my washing into the weekend and that is being too reliant on a nice weather weekend.  I need to change that.  After all I am not a teenager living at home where I can study as much as I want or think I need without thought to clean dishes and clothes and meals being provided.

My critical thinking course is very interesting and thought provoking.  I am learning about all sorts of fallacies with regards to arguing and how to determine if an argument is being strongly presented.  Thankfully so far I am tracking for a High Distinction.  I would really like that as I do have Big Plans for my future studies and good marks now will help with applying for scholarships later.

I will be studying my first Architecture subject next month.  I am a little excited and a bit nervous too but I have studied the basics of building when doing my drafting many years ago so it won't be too be a leap in understanding of concepts. 

The main issue I have now is balancing home, husband, health and homeschooling as well as my studies (couldn't figure out how to make that a H word  :-)  ).

I think if I want to continue studying I need to work out a plan.  Sadly that could mean an earlier bed time and an earlier wake up time.  I am better in the mornings for learning new things but I need to take into account the daily school wrangling (required with PS now and HS later) so I will need to start early enough to get a good amount of studying done but not so early that I am wiped out by mid morning.  lol

Funnily enough I have been tracking my sleep on my tablet and have noticed that 9 hours of sleep is a bit too much for me.  I feel more drowsy when I wake than when I have had only 7-8 hours.  The biggest deal for me seems to be the irregularity of my sleep and wake times. 

Of course, a dementia suffering, arthritically pained dog is not helping with 2am wake ups for the loo. It seems like I go from broken nights with babies to broken nights with an old dog.  I am even co-sleeping him (usually not allowed on beds) so he settles.  Ack!!  Well, I guess I could always switch the washing load and take advantage of the cheaper electricity overnight.  :-)

Well, there you have it.  I have been a busy little bee lately and will have for the next week with my final assessment of 1200-1500 words.  Check out the article I chose to analyse.  Very interesting!

Well, on the health front, I better go buy groceries.

Best wishes
Jen

Engage in life!

I know I need to work harder on teaching my children to live in the real world.  Very true and poignant YouTube!

Best wishes
Jen

Red weird things in my yard

I have done a good amount of walking in rainforests but I have never seen one of these before.

These are about 2-3 inches across.  Weird huh?

Apparently they aren't uncommon.  Here is what wikipedia had to say about them.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aseroe_rubra

I will have more soon as there are little white egg shaped things in the grass nearby.  You may be able to see one in the bottom left corner of the photo.

Yay, science in my own backyard!  :-)

Best wishes
Jen

Confused and not confused, still angry!

I hang out with a lot of PS people now and I find that the most forceful ones can start to do my head in, making it so I question my resolve to homeschool again.  They seem to focus on how great the social aspect is of school.

And yes, I can see there are great opportunities at school.  I don't think we would have known that one of my sons enjoys choir without that free chance to try out.   And there are some friendships forming through regular contact,  but if we had been able to access more homeschooling activities in our early days here and there had been social invitations from other families then friendships could have been formed while homeschooling too.

It might be working out here for the boys but I know from attending 13 primary schools and 2 high schools that there are no guarantees of the type of "society" in each one.  Some may be good like here, others will not.

I understand why people feel the need to pressure me.  Me being different makes them feel unsafe.  When I remember that this  is how society works to encourage conformity then I get less confused about my choices and goals.  And then I get a little angry that our society can't appreciate that what they are standing up for has flaws.  They don't want to acknowledge that their "PS god" has flaws.   It may work for lots but there are also lots for whom it doesn't work, and it can even go as far as harming.

Sorry,  but I am not agreeing with your propaganda!   I will not rely on the odds of getting another "good" school.  By the time we move I will hopefully have had at least one month of desensitisation to my allergens.   With some steely resolve and some improved health I will be homeschooling my boys again.  

I know my shortcomings and I also know the PS has them too.  There are no schooling gods, just different methods and I get to choose for my children, not others who can not see their schooling "god" has clay feet (and that applies to both camps).

Best wishes
Jen

Living in 2 different "school worlds"

Well, dh hasn't got a new job yet although we know his contract will be up mid-year and we know that I need to move away from cow paddocks that contain one of my big allergens.  So we are still here.  In this old house with old carpet and old walls.  But life goes on.

I am now living in 2 different school worlds.  I have 3 in school, with my fourth and youngest child ironically being my first child to go to Kindy.  The other 2 have moved up grades and are now in Grade 6 and Grade 4.  I am still homeschooling my eldest and will be using the most structured curriculum I know of.  Yup, very different to the last 5-8 years.

I am still very involved in the education of the ones at school.  Just like any other homeschool mum of several years I have accumulated several books and resources that I don't want to waste.  lol  We are doing critical thinking and reading comprehension activities from some of those resources.  All the teachers are happy for me to do extra things with the boys and are very supportive.  Nice to know, as I really love Singapore Maths and don't want to stop doing it.  And Building Thinking Skills books have always been favourites here any day of the week.  I don't think the boys even consider them school.  :-)

The oldest at school still struggles with his spelling and both of the elder two at school have horrible handwriting.  I am using the methods used in Sequential Spelling to help ds2.  They have a great resource available, The Patterns of English Spelling, and I hunt through it for words that have the same tricky sounds in them as his spelling words.    For handwriting I just sit there and nag them.  lol  Okay, probably not the best way, but I am thinking that consistency and high expectations may be my best bet there.  If you have suggestions for bad handwriting habits for a 8 and 11 year old please share!

And to top it all off I am volunteering in the canteen each Wednesday and am even considering joining the P and C.  I like being involved.  It has been a long time, what with all the moves and the babies, since I have had a chance to just chat with other women without little people interrupting.  Life is pretty good right now, just need to get more sleep (have continued some bad habits from my teen years and it is Not Good) and keep on top of these allergies and life will be good.

Best wishes
Jen

Electricity bill follow-up

I have been waiting with bated breathe for our electricity bill after learning more about changing the way we use the big appliances in our house.

I keep all the old bills so here is some interesting info.

Last quarter - daily kWh usage 41.15
Same quarter year before - daily kWh usage 42.40
Average daily cost last quarter - $9.48

This quarter - daily kWh usage 34.66
Same quarter year before - daily kWh usage 38.53
Average daily cost this quarter - $7.63

This is interesting to me because the usage of heavy drain appliances through all the quarters above would have been fairly consistent.  We can't use electric heating in this house due its old wiring so our bill doesn't go up in winter.  None of these bills cover summer so there is no air conditioning charges.

We have gone from 42.40 and 38.53  last year to this year being 41.15 and 34.66.  Looks small but it has been important.

How have I decreased my usage? 

Well, we are no longer rinsing the dishes with hot water before putting in the dishwasher and I am using a very long cycle. 

I am barely using the dryer although I will admit to a few days of using it to dry uniforms for school, but now I use the cool cycle for the same time and they are still coming out dry.  And for towels, hand towels and face washers the cool cycle has been working fine too. 

My washing machine is used just as much but I only use a 60 deg cycle when it is tea towels, socks and rags.  That load only usually goes in twice to three times a week.  For all other loads I have reduced the temperature from 60 deg to 40 deg.  I can't quite handle the idea that cold water will get clothes clean or prevent a build up of detergent in the washing machine so I won't go that far.

Overall I have gone from $132.72/fortnight to $106.82/fortnight.  That is about $780/year.  I like that.  And we haven't really done that well on reducing shower times.  (blush!)  There is still room in this budget to move!  And it is hopefully going to be down.

Best wishes
Jen

The Best Job in the World

A Weatherman

How can they get it this wrong and still get to keep their job?  Who else can do a complete turn about and still be called good at their job?

Well, I guess the 50% increase I paid in contents insurance because I live in a flood prone area goes towards helping those who sadly lost their homes due to living in fire prone areas.  Lose on the swings, gain on the merry go round.

Best wishes
Jen

Things I Have Learned the Hard Way

Here are some of the things that as a young homeschooling mother that I learned the hard way.

1.  Colouring in is not busy work.  It is a great way for a non-writing child to develop fine motor skills.
2.  Drilling for maths facts is not redundant.  A good foundation of facts laid early helps a lot later.
3.  Editing their own work helps them develop an eye for seeing what is truly there rather than what they intended to be there.  This works for Maths and Language Arts.
4.  Work on consistent effort or improvement will be very slow.  Especially in handwriting, see point 1 and 8 for extra help.
5.  Re-reading a book to find comprehension question answers helps train the eyes/brain to skim and find key words quickly.  Don't just allow them to rely on a great memory.
6.  Don't allow days to drift by in the interest of free play.  Make sure there is something you control about their day (even if only fifteen minutes after breakfast and fifteen minutes after lunch) so that when the time comes they accept that someone else does sometimes control their life despite their wishes.  Teach them to accept that with a good attitude.
7.  Set limits.  Life does!  It is cruel of us IMO to not teach our children that there are natural limits in life.  We can't eat as much as we like, we can't sleep as much as we like, and we can't eat anyway we like without consequences.  If we don't give some limits then they find it harder later.  I have certainly learned that with money.
8.  Filling in work sheets creates something that you can show later for them to see improvement when they think they "will never get it".
9.  Don't allow moods to control your days, theirs or yours.
10.  Don't allow disrespect to creep in to your home in the interest of free expression.

These are not necessarily in order of importance.  Just how my brain is working today!

Best wishes
Jen