End of an Era and Back to Homeschool

The 3 younger boys finished school on Friday.  With us moving soon on a date yet to be decided I felt it best to have a nice neat and tidy finish date.  I cried.  This school time has been a great experience.  They have had some great experiences and made some good friends.  I think we are all sad to be going.

It was a great school.  The boys got to make great friends and learned what school/education is about.  No issues with the school, wonderful place with teachers who cared and enjoyed their work.  I do think my 9 year old could have been pushed a bit and the 12 year old could have been supported more but I understand the limitations of the system.  :-)  And they taught the 6 year old to read.  Yay, my least favourite part of homeschooling.  I would rather teach maths any day.

So, now as we are about to move I have pulled them out of school and in this last term I am going to find out where they are at.  Handwriting needs work (always did) and I want to check on their basic maths skills.  But somehow I also need to fit in a move too.  :-( 

Anyway I guess I am a little scared.  I didn't do so well last time I had them all home.  I know I had a strong willed 4 year old at the same time as a hormonal 14 year old and I had my grass allergies.  This time the kids are all older.  The teen is a reasonable person (apart from doing his school work), the 4 year old is now a more reasonable 6 year old and I have been having immunology shots that so far are working well.  Usually as the weather warms I would be flat out with sinus headaches.  Not a single one..yet.. touch wood. 

So things are looking good, but I am still quite nervous.  I missed so many things that then caused the middle two issues at school.  I don't want to do that again.

Ahh, big breath, keep packing boxes and keep hugging the boys.  That should cover all the necessities.  :-)

Best wishes
Jen

Confused and not confused, still angry!

I hang out with a lot of PS people now and I find that the most forceful ones can start to do my head in, making it so I question my resolve to homeschool again.  They seem to focus on how great the social aspect is of school.

And yes, I can see there are great opportunities at school.  I don't think we would have known that one of my sons enjoys choir without that free chance to try out.   And there are some friendships forming through regular contact,  but if we had been able to access more homeschooling activities in our early days here and there had been social invitations from other families then friendships could have been formed while homeschooling too.

It might be working out here for the boys but I know from attending 13 primary schools and 2 high schools that there are no guarantees of the type of "society" in each one.  Some may be good like here, others will not.

I understand why people feel the need to pressure me.  Me being different makes them feel unsafe.  When I remember that this  is how society works to encourage conformity then I get less confused about my choices and goals.  And then I get a little angry that our society can't appreciate that what they are standing up for has flaws.  They don't want to acknowledge that their "PS god" has flaws.   It may work for lots but there are also lots for whom it doesn't work, and it can even go as far as harming.

Sorry,  but I am not agreeing with your propaganda!   I will not rely on the odds of getting another "good" school.  By the time we move I will hopefully have had at least one month of desensitisation to my allergens.   With some steely resolve and some improved health I will be homeschooling my boys again.  

I know my shortcomings and I also know the PS has them too.  There are no schooling gods, just different methods and I get to choose for my children, not others who can not see their schooling "god" has clay feet (and that applies to both camps).

Best wishes
Jen

Living in 2 different "school worlds"

Well, dh hasn't got a new job yet although we know his contract will be up mid-year and we know that I need to move away from cow paddocks that contain one of my big allergens.  So we are still here.  In this old house with old carpet and old walls.  But life goes on.

I am now living in 2 different school worlds.  I have 3 in school, with my fourth and youngest child ironically being my first child to go to Kindy.  The other 2 have moved up grades and are now in Grade 6 and Grade 4.  I am still homeschooling my eldest and will be using the most structured curriculum I know of.  Yup, very different to the last 5-8 years.

I am still very involved in the education of the ones at school.  Just like any other homeschool mum of several years I have accumulated several books and resources that I don't want to waste.  lol  We are doing critical thinking and reading comprehension activities from some of those resources.  All the teachers are happy for me to do extra things with the boys and are very supportive.  Nice to know, as I really love Singapore Maths and don't want to stop doing it.  And Building Thinking Skills books have always been favourites here any day of the week.  I don't think the boys even consider them school.  :-)

The oldest at school still struggles with his spelling and both of the elder two at school have horrible handwriting.  I am using the methods used in Sequential Spelling to help ds2.  They have a great resource available, The Patterns of English Spelling, and I hunt through it for words that have the same tricky sounds in them as his spelling words.    For handwriting I just sit there and nag them.  lol  Okay, probably not the best way, but I am thinking that consistency and high expectations may be my best bet there.  If you have suggestions for bad handwriting habits for a 8 and 11 year old please share!

And to top it all off I am volunteering in the canteen each Wednesday and am even considering joining the P and C.  I like being involved.  It has been a long time, what with all the moves and the babies, since I have had a chance to just chat with other women without little people interrupting.  Life is pretty good right now, just need to get more sleep (have continued some bad habits from my teen years and it is Not Good) and keep on top of these allergies and life will be good.

Best wishes
Jen

The Smoke and Mirror Illusions of the School System

I am reading an e-book called Stealing Dreams by Seth Godin, not quite sure how I came across it, but it has been a thought provoking read.  It is generally his answer to the question "What do you think we ought to do about education?"

It starts with the premise of why school as we know it was created in the first place.  Most homeschoolers have come across this before but just in case you haven't, a quick summary - to remove children from the labour force and to create jobs for adults in a newly industrialised world it was agreed to educate children in a similar factory-like fashion, with tests and processes to track progress.  It was important that these young people were taught to obey blindly, to follow systems unquestioningly and to all know the same basic things with no allowances for individuality or free thinking.

Here are some interesting excerpts:

What if we told students the truth?
Transparency in the traditional school might destroy it.  If we told the truth about the irrelevance of various courses, about the relative quality of some teachers, about the power of choice and free speech - could the school as we know it survive?

 ... Unlike just about every other institution and product line in our economy, transparency is missing from education.  Students are lied to and so are parents.  At some point, teenagers realize that most of school is a game, but the system never acknowledges it.  In search of power, control and independence, administrators hide information from teachers, and vice versa.

 ... The very texture of the traditional school matches the organization and culture of the industrial economy.  The bottom of the pyramid stores the students, with teachers (middle managers) following instructions from their bosses.

As in the traditional industrial organization, the folks at the bottom of the school are ignored, mistreated and lied to.  They are kept in the dark about anything outside of what they need to know to do their job (being a student), and put to work to satisfy the needs of the people in charge. 

He then goes on to point out that the connection we have across the world now with the internet is starting to show young people that they can learn on their own, about what they are truly interested in, without the necessity of the school system.  The school system is, in his opinion, losing its power to manipulate and lie to our young people, telling them that the only way to get an education is within the walls of a school.

I like the next section too.  It discusses how contracts have changed from being individually created between parties with agreement reached with both parties benefiting to one that is more implied by the very act of participating or using something created by an organisation.  This type of contract is not always as beneficial to both parties and is called an adhesion contract.  He points out that we and our children are agreeing to this type of contract just by entering the school gates.

We don't ask students to decide to participate.  We assume the contract of adhesion, and relentlessly put information in front of them, with homework to do and tests to take.

Entirely skipped: commitment.  Do you want to learn this? Will you decide to become good at this?

The universal truth is beyond question - the only people who excel are those who have decided to do so.  Great doctors or speakers or skiers or writers or musicians are great because somewhere along the way, they made the choice.

Why have we completely denied the importance of this choice?

 I am really struggling in some ways to cope with 2 of my children in school.  I see so much time wasted and not much learned.  I am fearful too that I am not up to it yet.  Not just yet!  I need this sabbatical without guilt or fear to get my head into gear for my next season of home schooling.  But I can tell you I am getting a real gut burn to get back on with it.  I just need better health and better consistency first.  Notice I didn't say perfect, or even good, just better!

More to come,

Best wishes
Jen

Socialisation of Schooled Children

From pg 19 of Homeschooling Review 1 October 2003 published by Qld Government, which was before the Education Act was changed to be more accommodating for home education.

HOME SCHOOLING MYTHS

One of the more popular myths about home schooling is that children who do not attend regular schooling are not socially developed and do not mature into confident well-balanced individuals. While there is an absence of detailed Australian research on this matter, there is much research in the United States of America and studies archived at the US-based Home School Legal Defence Association in Oregon. This research is broadly applicable to Australia.

In summary, researchers have found home schooled children are as well socialised as students educated in traditional State and non-State schools. Boyer ("The Socialisation Trap", 1993) researched the social stratification of children in schools by the lock-step age and grade approach to schooling. He concluded that by the time children are teenagers, they have little idea how to socialise with anyone outside of their peer group because of this approach to education.

The highlighted part gave me a good laugh this morning. With all sarcasm intended, Is that really what they want to happen?   Is this type of socialisation within the school system so terrific that it is the reason so many send their children to school?  And getting this type of socialisation is why I shouldn't homeschool my children?  Huh?!   Think about it guys!

Off to learn more about teaching writing.  Gee, maths is so much easier than parts of speech and grammar.  Yuk!

Best wishes

Jen

School Days Term 1

So, an update on the boys at school!  The eldest has had issues with personal organisation.  I got him a binder with 2 pockets, one for things going to school and the other for things coming home.  It has helped a lot to avoid the whole crumpled papers in the bag buried under yesterday's lunch box problem, but he really needs to remember to check the pockets fully when he can't find his homework book. :-(

His desk is also a mess and it seems he may holding up the class at times while he tries to find papers or books for the next lesson.  I suggested a basket similar to what I use at home with books behind a divider and loose papers in front.  His teacher has approved it, although he did express concerns at Jackson being different to everyone else and possibly getting teased.  I had asked Jackson before spending any money if he had more concerns about being teased or about being behind all the time.  He is getting teased anyway for the mess he has his desk in so he figures teasing for being different is worth the risk.  The teacher is going to make space for the basket on his shelf near his desk and will change where Jackson sits so he can get to his books and papers more easily.  Also the teacher joked that at least he will see more of him than just the top of his head all the time as he digs around under his desk looking for books or papers.  :-)

My younger one is doing well in his class I think.  I will be seeing his teacher next week to just chat, see what he is doing.  I think he has surprised her sometimes.  He was asking/telling her about negative numbers the other day and she said that he won't do them until high school.  Well, I tested him and he can do simple addition and subtractions with negative numbers like -2+5 and -5+2.  Hmm, fun!!  I certainly haven't taught them although apparently dh has had a discussion or two with him about them.

I would love to have the boys home again but we are all learning from this experience at the moment.  My teen at home is learning that he Can Do his work if he just focuses, and he will get rewarded.  I am learning from the teachers at school how to occupy kids who finish quickly and how to deal with disorganised students.  I hadn't realised that these issues were part of our problems at home so this has been really helpful.

Otherwise the whole experience has been good.  Expensive, but good!  I would rather spend $300 on books than school uniforms and shoes but that is me (and probably most other homeschool mums!).

Best wishes
Jen

How to Annoy Your Kids

There are some things that are just fun to do to your kids.  One of mine is to chant in cheerleader fashion the quietest kid's name and dance around too.  He blushes and smiles indulgently at his silly mum.  Another way is to give squeezy hugs. The bad bit there is that they are starting to return them.  :-)

Recently my school kids have been leaving lunches uneaten and don't seem to be even drinking much water while at school.  I have threatened them with a CD of me educating (nagging?) them about all the good things that are in their lunch boxes and why they need to eat them.  I figure I can play it on the way to and from school.

This morning the older of the 2 school going kids checked out if I could really do it.  I proved I could by telling him the process I would use to get my talking onto a CD.  He was a bit concerned.  :-)  Good!

Jo, over at All the Blue Day, posted this link about big family rules in the last few days.  I think this mother could be a mum after my own heart.  Very funny!

I really do think "annoying" our kids is one very good way to release tension yet still have a good laugh.  Creative parenting maybe?!

Best wishes
Jen

Public School Update after Week 5

I am having to learn a whole new language it seems with school.  Even though the kids started back midweek the weeks are counted as 5 even though it was really only 4 and 2 days.

Jack, the almost 11 year old, still doesn't like going to school.  It isn't tears, more just a question asked in a hopeful tone, "Can I be homeschooled again?".  I know this year will be "hard" for him but as long as I see him learning how to cope and not collapsing into a heap of tears or other symptoms of stress, he will be continuing on with this year of school.

His teacher says that he has troubles organising himself and doesn't cope well when he doesn't understand what needs to be done.  I have also noticed that papers tend to get lost in his bag and things missed.  I have purchased a ring binder with two pockets to put in it, one for "Things to go Home" and one for "Things to go to School".  I have also included a calendar for the rest of term and a homework checklist.  I am hoping that by working with his teacher on this that we may be able to help him be more organised.

The teacher has been quite good.  At first I didn't think he would be approachable but he is easy to talk to and we are commiserating together and also talking about solutions.  The other day in the school yard when picking the boys up he commented on some of the troubles that Jack has been having, sounding quite concerned, and I told him that I have bad allergies to grass and have basically been laid out for 2 weeks with infected sinuses.  I said that a bad day at school was better than nothing done at home due to me being sick.  He smiled.  He is an older gentleman, sort of serious most of the time, so that surprised me. 

Harry, the now 8 year old (sob!), is going well.  At least it appears that way.  He gets to talk to me a lot at home, explaining his thought processes.  He doesn't get to do that at school and I wonder if it is making him a little sad.  It is hard to tell as he is a quiet introvert type.  I think I need to catch up with his teacher soon, even if only by email.

I volunteered at the canteen/tuck shop today.  (Why does each state in Australia call it something different?)  I got asked for my Anzac biscuit recipe.  It was busy but I thought I did well.  I will probably never "fit in" but I was like that anyway even before I became a homeschooler.  I just have to be myself.  If I say so myself I am not too hard to get along with, I just don't cope well with big groups.  Apparently they don't "fire" anyone so even if I make mistakes I will still be back for another Friday morning in 2 weeks time.  :-)

Well, off to do my junk mail job.  Photos of the birthday boy to come!  (Yes Mum, I will do it this weekend!)

Best wishes
Jen

After 10 days of Public School

Well, ten days have passed and my boys are still okay.  Tired, and sometimes overwhelmed but okay.

I am getting uniforms done although I must admit to a few days of them coming straight out of the dryer and onto bodies.  Ironing never was a strong suite and I am trying to do it so the boys learn good presentation but some days are just a bit too short on time.

Lunches are another thing.  I am so used to doing hot lunches, sometimes admittedly left overs and some just pasta with peas, corn and salmon thrown in but still hot.  Making sandwiches every day gets a bit boring.  I am trying to add variety in other ways. 

On Tuesdays we are doing a Trashy Treat Tuesday lunch box.  I wouldn't normally give my boys any of those wrapped bars, muesli or not, and definitely not lollies or flavoured drinks.  We drink lots of water at home.  Not juice, and only occasionally a glass of milk!  So far for last Tuesday they had LCM bars, cold pizza, chocolate custard tubs, and a little pack of lollies.  Their drink was a 100% juice drink.  I couldn't bring myself to giving them a 35% fruit drink.  Yuk!  This week it will be a muffin bar, lollies, vanilla custard tubs, pizza and strawberry milk poppers.

I figure this way there are some limits on how much junk creeps into their lunch boxes due to peer pressure and herd mentality.  :-)

DS2 (10, almost 11 yo) is probably the one having the hardest time.  He has asked every night if he has to go to school tomorrow.  He doesn't want to keep going.  And this weekend he had a big sobbing cry on my lap.  I know it will be a big deal for him.  So many changes and he tears up easily anyway.  The male teacher tells him there is no need for tears (which is almost exactly the words  I use, so that isn't an issue) but I do wonder how DS2 is going to go long term.  And will his teacher lose patience with him if he doesn't settle?

In other activities his tears have gradually gone after a week or two and he has gotten on with enjoying the experience. I do hope he does cope with this big change in our lives with time.  I am very much looking out to make sure he is okay.  I know the little bird needs to leave the nest sometime and I have told him I am here for hugs anytime.  I just don't want to push him too hard and have him go splat! IYKWIM!

This kid is the one who still wants his teddy and has big long cuddles.  He also doesn't like change and gets upset at even the thought of it.  I want him to learn to flow with change a bit more and to not get overly stressed.  Time will only tell if public school is the way for him to learn these skills.

Best wishes
Jen

Before and After Public School Day 1

6.40am
I had a horrible night's sleep, nightmares about trusting people I don't know.  This is not going to be easy, handing my two precious bundles to strangers who I am supposed to trust just because they are part of the government.

Well, their uniforms are all ironed, they have worn their shoes for short stretches (that reminds me, pack them both some band aids!), lunch boxes are in the fridge packed, water bottles in the freezer chilling and now we need to have breakfast, get faces clean and hair respectable, and put it altogether before 8.45.

Why am I writing a blog instead of getting going?  Because the baby still likes his morning moo and it is not worth his or my stress levels to rush him.

1pm update
Well the boys got settled fairly easily.  No tears, just a quick kiss and off they went.  It is awfully quiet at home with only 2 boys and 1 of them on the computer playing.  It was even quieter when the youngest decided to have a middle of the day sleep for an hour.

This is going to be very interesting, working to someone else's timetable.  But then again it could be very useful because as homeschoolers we haven't really had much of a sense of urgency about anything regularly.

I will start the teenager on his school next Monday, once the dust has settled and things are happening more smoothly with getting to school.

8pm update
Jack said it was a fun day although I think now after gymnastics as well that he may be a bit tired.  I don't know if it was timing or the speed my boys eat at but they didn't have long to eat lunch before going to play.  Lunchboxes came home with a lot still in them.  Of course, it could have also been a panicking mum worrying about my kids starving and packing too much.  lol  Anyway on Grandma's suggestion they have finished off their lunch boxes this afternoon.

Jack (my 10 year old) knows someone in his class from another activity.  I don't think Harry (7) has made any friends yet, but he is my shy one who really doesn't mind playing on his own either.  He has always been that way, even as a toddler.  I would quite often panic because I couldn't hear him when he was about 1.5/2 years old and then find him quietly playing by himself in the sandpit or with a pile of rocks.  So cute!  And not very demanding after the Aspie and the jumping kid!

I am gradually figuring things out like where to meet them for pick up and what "toys" are allowed.  There seems to be a lot of restrictions but the boys will learn.  I guess it is like visiting at someone else's house and having to learn the house rules.

Well, got to wrangle some boys to bed for a story.  Why does cleaning teeth take so long?

Best wishes
Jen

Homeschool to Public School - 9 days to go

Well, I am starting to feel more nervous now.  I still need to get the boys their uniforms and I can't quite wrap my head around what to do for lunches.  We have never really been big sandwich people so it could be interesting.

    "Tell me what you read and I'll tell you who you are" is true enough, but I'd know you better if you told me what you reread.  ~François Mauriac

I have been repacking my bookshelves after waiting a long time for them to cure after painting them white.  In the unpacking and resorting I have noticed some old friends that I have reread, and some that I should reread that may help with inspiration for homeschooling.

I am getting to the age where I have regrets and I don't like it.  I have a small window left to be able to do some of things I wanted to do in my homeschool.  I either need to let go of those ideals or get on with giving them a lot more effort than I have so far.

Best wishes

Jen

PS Found this quote while looking for the above quote.  I love it!

    The best of a book is not the thought which it contains, but the thought which it suggests; just as the charm of music dwells not in the tones but in the echoes of our hearts.  ~Oliver Wendell Holmes 

Home to Public School - 28 days to go

So I have been thinking about why this whole homeschooling idea didn't work out so well for our family.  I want to understand why so that I can return to it in the future.

Some factors that have had an influence on how well (or not) it has gone:

1. Tiredness due to extended breastfeeding, usually 4 years per child, longer in 2 cases
2. Tiredness and mummy fog due to a pregnancy every 3 to 3.5 years, yup, the pregnancies overlap the breastfeeding
3. Tiredness due to headaches and fogginess due to chronic grass allergies that flare up into seasonal sinus headaches that really knock me down (so very thankful I don't have migraines though so I don't see this as a whinge at all, just the facts as they are)
4. Inability to direct my kids to do what I want them to do as I don't like confrontation
5. A definite lack of funds for about 6 of those years, which tends to make me freeze up mentally and not use anything in case we don't have the resources to move on, also meant there was no funds for organising all the things that come with homeschooling and 4 children's worth of toys and clothes
6. Depression due to tiredness, guilt, feeling of low self worth, messy house with no tools to organise it all due to lack of funds
7. Having an oppositional Aspie child as my eldest (remember I don't like confrontation!) threw my self confidence out the window, no idea on how to handle him 
8. Lack of confidence in my ability to teach when everything I tried didn't help my eldest to learn to read (he finally got it on his own around 9 years old and I felt like nothing I did contributed to his learning at all)
9. No family support close by although my mum and dad are supportive of homeschooling!  TG!
10. No time off, as in None for a very long time!  For basically 12 years, until the eldest was old enough to be left home for short periods with younger ones to mind, I did not have a single break from parenting and household responsibilities.  If I went out while dh looked after the kids it was solely for jobs like shopping, library visits, or actual income work at a local supermarket.  I didn't get to go anywhere on my own.
11. My introvert nature gets overwhelmed by managing all the noise associated with 4 children who I haven't had the energy/confidence to teach to act in a way that doesn't overwhelm me.
12. Moving interstate and between towns several times - no feeling settled, no friends, no networks of support!
13. Self discipline that could really do with some work (But as most of my self discipline issues also hinge on directing others to fit into the life I envision for us, it doesn't help that avoiding conflict is an issue for me too.  It is enough that I need to have conflict with my own comfortable but not useful ways but to then also try to direct others to move out of their comfortable but not useful ways is just too much especially when I am tired - see above.)

Wow!  I hope that covers everything.  I need to see what I can do to "fix" some of these.  Hopefully some things are just seasons and will soon be off the "problem" list.

1. For example, no more kids to come, and only 1 last child to wean.  
2. Dh fully understands that a family our size needs a steady income.  He will be doing his utmost to ensure we don't have long periods of low income again.   
3. I have found a combination of natural remedies and homeopathic remedies that seem to be reducing my reactions to my grass allergies.  
4. We will be moving closer to family again with the next job. 
5.  I will be making sure to establish some support networks for myself very quickly when that happens.

And I am really hoping that as the tiredness and depression from the guilt, money stresses and loneliness lift that I will have the courage to try again, to do what I need to do to homeschool my kids again after this break.
Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 41 days to go

If the count seems off it is because I thought they would start school on Tuesday 29 January but I found out the other day they start on the Wednesday.  I also found out that they are putting Jackson in to year 5 (he turns 11 at the beginning of the year) and Harrison into year 3 (he turns 8 at the beginning of the year).  I hope that doesn't cause issues for Harrison.  He is bright but his maturity may not match the others in his class with him having a February birthday, although... he is possibly more mature as he has older brothers to play with.  Hmm, don't know, will keep an eye on it all.

This a sort of out of order list of things that would bother me if they changed too drastically due to the boys being at school.  Again some things have more weight in my mind than others.

• They need to still be able spend valuable family time together eg dinner together as much as possible and free time on the weekends, not overtaken by school projects/homework.

• They need to be willing to play with each other and to still be understanding when their siblings are at different levels of skill and understanding.

• I won't tolerate name calling, or derogatory remarks about other's achievements or lack of skills.  I will be very firm on this as it is something that I have always had a zero tolerance for and if the school influence is so strong that I am constantly battling this issue it will be a big deal.

• I would like to hear that the boys treat each other well at school and do not get so influenced by peer pressure that they won't "play" with a sibling if they are lonely or struggling.

• I would like them to have friends that are willing to visit for playdates outside school hours.  If friendships are only at school I really don't see much difference to how our homeschooling experience in this small town is working out and I will re-evaluate the "value" of school for socialising.

• The boys need to be "allowed" to work at their own level with a bit of encouragement for improving.  I don't want to see them held back and getting bored or pushed so hard that they are not able to overcome the stress of working a little harder to achieve a better result.

• Our health has always been pretty good and I value it.  If more than 2 weeks are lost each term due to viruses going through the family then I will not be pleased.  Of course I know the first term could be rough, new environment and all that, and second not so good with change of season stuff, but by halfway through the year I would hope they are not coming home with a new bug every few weeks.  It would really be hard to be "sick" all the time, very tiring.

Love to hear your comments,
Jen

Home School to Public School - 44 days to go

So here is my scratch list so far of the Pro's and Con's of School and Homeschool.

I know not everything is here but these are the ones that are important to me and keep me thinking (and worrying!).

School:
Pro's

• packed lunch
• see what others eat, may be more willing to try new things
• exposure to other interests eg choir, sports
• learn that not everything is easy
• learn to push themselves instead of coasting
• time for me to have a hobby
• get help to get up to "grade" level
• will get the chance to experience a "regular" schedule of work, meals and play
• hopefully more friends for a birthday party or play dates
• home will be tidier and cleaner due to no kids around

Con's

• bullies but hopefully not
• negative attitude from a teacher
• unable to "fit in" when it is necessary
• uniform costs
• pushing of reading may lead to dislike of lifelong reading
• disrespect of mum and dad, more respect for teachers
• miss out on a more interesting education with bunny trails
• miss out on using lots of resources I already have
• "system" doesn't care about my values for my family
• house may be "too quiet"

Homeschool:
Pro's

• focused teacher attention so won't "fall through the cracks" if some area is not learnt well
• hugs and support when work is hard
• can learn at own pace with choice of curriculum to suit learning style
• better breakfasts

Con's

• too easy to slow down too much too often
• distraction of TV and PCs
• Mum gets distracted by "projects"
• Mum's health can be up and down and days, even weeks, can be missed until she is better
• messy and noisy house nearly all the time
• can't keep up with household chores on my own in the time available

 Well, at least now I can "lose" the piece of paper I was writing it all down on.  And not everything is equally weighted in it's impact, so the decision is still not easy.  Ah well!

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 64 days to go

So in the most part I am actually accepting the idea of school now.  I am even at peace with it.

Today I read this post from a dad about kids who don't learn how to deal with pain and how it doesn't necessarily make their life as an adult easier.  The rest of the blog is also great.  In fact bought the book and read it over the weekend.  :-)

This is a big factor in the decision to put some of my kids in school.  While it hurts my heart that they may not make friends easily, may get rejected at times (as we all do) and will have to cope with being behind/ahead in some subjects, I do also know that my kids have been protected by our homeschooling.  With everything else in our lives being fairly stable at the moment and likely to be for the next 12 months this is the ideal time to take on the big Public School Experiment. 

In the 4 years before we settled here we had moved from Brisbane to Hobart to Launceston to Dorrigo in NSW, to the Hunter Valley.  We were not in any of those places (except Brisbane) for more than 12 months.  Now we have been here almost 6 years.  I couldn't put my kids in school during that time of upheaval.  I didn't think it was fair on them when we had so many other stresses going on but now... not so bad.

I still have my boundaries in place.  There are certain lines that if crossed will mean the end of the PSE.  I will post those another day.

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 70 days to go

Someone I was talking to today who works in the special ed part of a high school said they have to be insistent, persistent and consistent with kids with Aspergers.

I googled it (as you do) and came up with this article which was very relateable to how I have mismanaged things so far and gave me a much clearer idea of how to manage my children.

Today the middle boys, 10 and 7, went to their school for the morning.  They went well although my 10 year old, late reader, only reads at level 14 whereas the 7 year old reads at level 18 (don't know what scale they are using).  This will likely mean remedial work for the 10 year old and maybe a grade jump for the 7 year old.  They are thinking of putting DS3 (now 7, 8 in February) into Grade 3 instead of 2 as he would normally be expected to be.  I am not sure how that will go, just hope they keep him challenged.  (Nice to know for me as mum/teacher that they can't say I didn't teach my kids if one can do so well while another not so well!)

The 10 year old just wants to make friends and have kids his own age to play with.  I hope they don't dump on him for his lack of skill in some areas and that he can have a good school experience.

In discussing it all, sometimes at high volume and speed I must admit, dh and I have decided to make a check list of the things that we will not tolerate happening in school for our kids.  If too many criteria get "bad marks" then we will pull them out.  I don't want school to be a damaging experience.  I guess though my perspective of school may be coloured by my experiences of 13 primary schools over 4 states in 7 years.  Not fun being the new kid all the time!  May be they will have a great time, learn lots and make some good friends.  I have to let them travel their own journey, no matter my fears.

It may not be so easy for the 14 year old Aspie.  He may struggle and I am not so sure I want to throw him to the sharks in a system that is reducing its funding for special needs across the state.  From stories I read of those kids pulled out due to "uniqueness" to do homeschool I think putting him in school may be a risky gamble I don't want to take.

Ahh, well!!  Lots to consider.

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 73 days to go

I had a funny dream the other night.  I always "ask" my dreams what they mean.  In other words I think of my dreams as my subconscious trying to tell me something.  If I am still in that dopey post sleep state and I am reviewing the dream I ask myself what it means and take the quickest reply without thinking as my subconscious expressing itself more clearly.

So this one answered me that essentially I am the one responsible for making my dreams of long term home schooling get taken away due to my inaction and lack of gumption.  Hmm, don't like that!  Is it fair that your own subconscious kicks you when you are down?

What do I do?  Well, I am making plans and continuing on as though the boys are going to go to school.  I will change the way we do things to fit in with the timetable of school.  If I struggle to get the boys on track with school then I will have to hand the job over and just cry at home on my own.  Really, if I can't go for my dreams (that are totally possible) then I just don't have it.  If I can guide our days onto a better path with the 'threat' of my boys going to school for a big chunk of the day (and eroding relationships we have built, taking away our choice of free time, bringing home attitudes I may not agree with, dictating what happens on our weekends due to assignments or homework) then I get to keep them home but I need to work at this lot harder.  I need to do everything I can to make this homeschool experience something that my boys will not regret.

I am looking into work potentials that will work around either option as I really feel that part of our struggles are a single income that pays the bills and keeps our heads above water but not much extra.  It doesn't help with doing the fun stuff like art or music classes, or going to live performances, or getting sport equipment for more activity as a family.  I also really need a home with furniture that means the clutter can be cleared away or I get overwhelmed and depressed at the mess.  After all, no point trying to clean up if items don't have a place to go.

I also really need to get a backbone too.  Either way!  If they are at school and bringing home attitudes I don't want in my home then I need to make sure they know what will not be tolerated.  If they are at home I need to make sure my kids understand that when I say do I mean do now, and quickly.  I need them to understand that I am in charge and that while I will allow a certain amount of freedom that I will expect respect in return.

Hmm, will keep you in the loop as I try to cope with these upcoming changes in my life.

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 76 days to go

So I have since seen the principal and the kindergarten teacher of the local primary school and called the local high school.

The kindergarten teacher said that Griffin, with a June birthday for turning 5, is just a bit too young for Kindy.  Did you know that they expect them to be able to write a sentence by the end of the year?  Wow, that is so quick!  What I would like to know is why are there so many high school students who can not be get by at Uni standard of writing if they started so young?  Some thing is wrong there!

Jackson (10) and Harry (7) will be going for a visit next week from 9 to 12. 

I hated sitting in with all the boys while I pointed out where their weaknesses lay.  That should have been done out of their earshot.  Anyway, Jackson was "great".  When asked what his favourite subject was he said xBox at the beginnng and end of his list.  And when asked if he liked history or science he didn't reply.  Funnily enough back home when asked he could give me a very good definition of history.  And only yesterday on a cartoon a character said he would fly to the moon or Mars.  Both my 10 and 14 year old said go to the Moon and they both explained different aspects of why such as weather and temperature.  Not so bad!

I am talking school up a lot.  I don't want to jeopardise their experience.  I may have all these fears inside but I need to be strong for them.  Jackson is not bursting into tears at every mention of it now, but I do wonder how he is coping when we had a wet bed this morning.  He did sleep in compared to his usual early bird wake up so that may have been why.  He usually only has about 1 accident a year because we figured out what his triggers are and how he needs to dress in each season.  I hope this was just a one-off and not a sign of stress.

Anyway this blog is becoming my journal of how we go on this journey.  It will hopefully help me to see whether this is a good or bad idea.

Best wishes
Jen

Home to Public School - 78 days to go

Hubby and I are strongly considering putting all our boys in public school next year.  As I consider this I want to "nut out" all my fears and thoughts on this idea.

So far my biggest concerns are that my 10 year old is likely to be "behind" so he will have some struggles with work until he catches up, my 14 year old is a typical teenager thinking he knows everything and he will be in for a severe shock, and I am worried that my little 4.5 year old may cope with being away from me. Sob!

I am going to call the schools today and find out the procedure.  Bit scary having to deal with public servants who will likely think they are better than me, and with regards to education do know a lot more than me, but I know my boys and I would say I have done better than they would have with regards to shaping their character and morals.

Best wishes
Jen